I went to Fort Riley and all I got was this crappy haircut

So I went to the PX to get a haircut... It was closing time. When she asked me how I wanted (what's left of my hair) cut, I said "short..." Before I could get out the rest of the phrase "...on the sides and trim the top" she had already initiated what I would describe as a reverse mohawk, straight down the center of my head.

At that point, there was no turning back. So my head is now 'buzzed.'

I did not tip her. I should have tipped her with some carreer advice: She isn't very good at her current occupation, and perhaps she should pursue a career in garbage collection or maybe in asphalt application. Or maybe as a crash test dummy. Or window licker. You get the idea.

Inshallah, as the Arabs say.

I am going bald over time, but this may have expedited the process. I haven't had it this short since Basic Training at Fort Benning (The Land That God Forgot), which was 20 years ago.

Hope it grows back.

What do you think? Is the Uncle Finster look for me? It works for Bruce Willis, right?